I am my first client every day: facing my hyper-achiever saboteur

Dec 5

Today I want to share something from my most uncomfortable seat: the seat of being my own first client of the day.
Because as much as I’d love it, being a coach doesn’t give me a VIP pass to escape human challenges.
It doesn’t make me immune to gray days, to self-doubt, or—worst of all—to the traps of my own mind.

If you have your own dragons to face, trust me, I have mine too.
And the most powerful one is the Hyper-Achiever.

I truly understood its impact when I joined a Positive Intelligence (PQ) program and realized how much influence this saboteur had over me.
That constant drive to perform more, prove more, achieve more.
A motor that can look admirable… until it starts to cost you.

The Judge and Its Saboteurs: in summary

When I immersed myself in the Positive Intelligence (PQ) program by Shirzad Chamine a little over a year ago, I finally put names to the internal voices that were self-sabotaging me.
Chamine explains that 80% of people don’t reach their true potential for happiness and success because of these mental patterns.

The Judge

It’s the Master Saboteur—the root of all. Its job is to criticize and find flaws.
Typical phrase: “You’re not good enough.”

The Nine Accomplice Saboteurs

These nine thinking patterns represent the different ways we self-sabotage, each rooted in survival strategies learned during childhood.
According to Chamine, they are:

✦ Hyper-Achiever: ties self-worth to performance and never feels it’s enough.
✦ Pleaser: seeks approval by putting others first.
✦ Controller: needs to direct everything in order to feel safe.
✦ Perfectionist (Stickler): fears mistakes and demands impossible standards.
✦ Avoider: avoids discomfort and conflict.
✦ Restless: jumps between tasks and experiences to avoid emptiness.
✦ Victim: seeks visibility or protection through emotional intensity.
✦ Hyper-Vigilant: lives in constant alert, anticipating threats.
✦ Hyper-Rational: disconnects from emotions, justifies or overanalyzes instead of taking action.

Each one has a valid emotional root.
But here’s the truth: if we don’t observe them, they run the show.

The hardest part of this learning

Knowing my saboteurs doesn’t give me permission to ignore them.
On the contrary—it gives me responsibility.

Once you understand how your mind works—what limits you, what triggers you, what disconnects you—
you can’t keep acting “without noticing.”

That would be negligence toward yourself.

Because now you have a choice.
Now you have a map.
Now you have a way to counter them.

The antidote: your Sage

In Positive Intelligence, the Sage is the part of you that acts from purpose, calm, compassion, empathy, and clarity.
It’s the part that doesn’t react—it chooses.

To balance my Hyper-Achiever, I train my Sage daily with practices that may help you too:

✦ Micro-pauses to reduce stress

I do PQ Reps (e.g., 10 seconds of sensory focus) to anchor myself in the present and interrupt the fight-or-flight system that fuels the Hyper-Achiever.

✦ Celebrating progress, not just goals

This restores motivation and self-worth.
I spend a couple of minutes reflecting on “mini-wins” each day—recognizing effort, process, and momentum, not just the final outcome.

✦ Choosing from purpose

I resist the urge to be “busy,” to do for the sake of doing, or to do at maximum speed.
Before starting a task, I ask my Sage:
“What action will create the most value or move me closer to my deeper purpose today?”

And something that seals all these practices: your worth is not your achievement

If you’re ambitious, I know how hard it is to silence that voice.
But the biggest lesson from my own coaching journey, grounded in Chamine’s model, is this:

Your intrinsic value isn’t found in your completed to-do list.
Your value lies in who you are—here and now.

Being a coach doesn’t make me perfect. It makes me aware.

And awareness brings responsibility.
Today I understand how my mind operates.
I recognize when my Hyper-Achiever grabs the wheel.
And I know how to return to my Sage.

That’s why I say I am my first client every day:

Because I apply in myself what I teach.
Because I can’t guide others if I’m not practicing what I preach.
Because knowing yourself without transforming is a subtle form of self-abandonment.

If you already recognize your own saboteurs, the next step is taking action.

Your Sage is always available… if you choose to activate it.

✎ If you want to work on your saboteurs and strengthen your Sage, you might want to take the PQ Program with Shirzad Chamine, or reach out!

#PositiveIntelligence #Leadership #Purpose #VidaCoach

Sofia Chang Mora